Holidays and Insulin Shock

I've posted about my love of cake before, but in honor of the holidays I'm posting one of my favorite sites, http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/ They have some great and hilarious holiday cakes for your enjoyment.

Also, check out recent baking enthusiast John Mayer's latest entries on Interfaith Baking, and check out some of the cool cake pictures that fans have sent in. Link here.

Merry Christmas to all! Diets start Friday!

More Required Listening

I avoided listening to Raising Sand, Robert Plant's collaboration with Alison Krauss, for a long time. It just seemed too odd to work. For those who don't know. Robert Plant was the lead singer of Led Zeppelin, probably best known for singing Stairway to Heaven and generally inspiring Heavy Metal. Alison Krauss is probably best known as the poster child for Bluegrass music and was heavily featured on the O Brother Where Art Thou? By all rights this shouldn't work. Who even suggested this collaboration? Well, whoever it was is a freaking genius because their album together is one of the greatest things I've ever heard. Highly recommend that you sample some tracks.

As I Lay Dying

I managed to get sick midway through my tax final. Thankfully, I didn't know anything about the subject anyway so it didn't affect my performance. I'm just hoping for that All important C-. At this point, my motto is C's get degrees.

Before finals, I went and dropped a wad on Amazon's mp3 shop. For those of you still downloading from iTunes or pirating from limewire, get with the times. Amazon is where it's at. The music is DRM free. Restricted music is so last year, as is getting sued.

As I've basically been stuck at home in bed waiting out the chills, dizzyness, headache, and crazy David Lynchesque nightmares I haven't had much to do except zone in and out of consciousness while listening to my iPod. So, without further ado, here's the latest recommendations for your download list.

Old 97's- Question and Murder or a Heart Attack

What's that you ask? When did I get into alt country? Get with the program, peeps. Alt Country is where it is at. The Eagles, Bob Dylan, Johnny Cash, if they were around today they'd be lumped into the Alt Country category. Don't forget that Wilco emerged from the remains of Uncle Tupelo, which was the poster child of the Alt Country movement in the 90's. That said, I defy you to find anything as catchy as Murder or a Heart Attack. I love this song. It gets caught in my head and keeps me company all day long. Kind of like the voices which tell me to burn things.

Apologies, but youtube only had a decent video for question. Still a good song, but not AS good.




The Helio Sequence- Lately

The best thing to come out of the White Stripes revolution is the realization that a band only needs two people. Sorry Bass players, but most of you are just glorified metronomes. Anyway, the two man line up is about where any similarity with the White Stripes ends. The sequence sounds a lot more like Coldplay with Bob Dylan as the frontman. It's good stuff.



The Kooks-Always where I need to be.

Yet another example of Indie Rock being more than whiny dudes with an acoustic guitar. I'm a bit of a latecomer to the Kooks, as they've officially become so buzzed about that they're essentially mainstream at this point (They have an actual music video. Sellouts!). I don't care, I don't have any street cred that needs preserving.


Neutral Milk Hotel- In an Aeroplane over the Sea.

Speaking of whiny guys with acoustic guitars...

I've always thought the best musicians were the ones who could hold their own in front of a crowd with nothing but an acoustic guitar. NMH is pretty much from forever ago, but it's amazing how unknown they remain in most circles. Bonus points for the horn solo in the middle.

The National-Mistaken for Strangers and Fake Empire

I was going to post the video for Mistaken but then I found out that it was directed by a guy named, I'm not making this up, "Thread Count." I'm not going to lie, it's pretty much killed the song for me. Maybe enen the band. Too bad because they were really good. Here's the band live on Letterman.


Ra Ra Riot-Can you Tell

Darn it, picking between favorite Ra Ra Riot songs is like picking between you children. St. Peter's Day Festival is also a treat. This band is one of my recent favorites if for no other reason than they have an electric cello and it actually sounds good. And you know my feelings on cellos. They are the audio equivalent of Sylvester Stallone's acting.

Beirut- Scenic World I've heard a lot about Beirut and I've been meaning to give them a spin for a while now, but I've resisted because they have an accordion player. Generally, I feel that the Accordion is like Tom Waits voice: It has no place in music. (Cue angry emails defending Tom Waits). I'm happy to say I was wrong and that Beirut is completely awesome. As synth music seems to be catching on more it's good to hear some novel and organic sounds.


Panda Bear- Comfy in Nautica From unorthodox instruments to no instruments. Panda Bear's A Capella + Sound Effects song is insanely catchy (or is that kitschy?). The song is good enough that I will forgive the dude for stealing the title Panda Bear, which I had long intended to be my Rap Name. I'll also forgive him for using sound looping in his live performances, but I have to tell you that it was likeing finding out there is no Santa Clause.

I didn't like the normal video for the song (skateboarders?), so I replaced it with this one full of Indiana Jones scenes.



Ben Folds- Fred Jones Part II

An oldie, but a goodie, and often overlooked. No one does depressing like Ben, and this song is one of his better forays into Melancholy. The sad tale of a man who's life has passed him by and finds that his usefulness is gone. I included this clip because it features the random and unintentionally hilarious cameo by the dude from CAKE.



The Weepies- The World Spins Madly On

Darn it, this group is like Buckingham Nicks, but mellower. This makes me wish I had the original Buckingham Nicks record on Vinyl. Anyone who wants a good Christmas Gift idea for me, there you have it. Okay, back to the Weepies.

No, wait, we need to go back to Buckingham Nicks. How is Lindsay Buckingham so under appreciated? He was the lead guitarist for one of the most successful groups of all time and he is a guitar savant. He's never mentioned on anyone's top guitarist list and that's just criminal. He's released two solo albums in the past couple years and they are as good as anything Fleetwood Mac did post-Rumors. How is he the least famous member of that group?

Okay, back to the Weepies. I'm telling you, this group has major upside. Look for them to continue to sell their ethereal, mellow tunes to undeserving movies for the next several years, or join a formerly well thought of power blues group fallen on hard times and transform it with their pop influence culminating in a best selling album fueled by divorce and Mick Fleetwood's cocaine habit.

Please ignore the fact that this video was taken from a total chick flick.

What is a GPU

Ah, Mythbusters, How I heart you.

Watch the demonstration of Leonardo 1.0, 2.0, and then the second video show's what happens when a man get shot by 1100 paintballs at once

Hipster?

For those of you who have ever wondered what a hipster is and whether you or someone you know might be a hipster, Urban Dictionary provides the following definition:

	People in their teens to 20s who generally listen to indie rock, hang out in coffee shops, shop at the thrift store and talk about things like books, music, films and art.

The Hipster Handbook offers this definition:

One who possesses tastes, social attitudes, and opinions deemed cool by the cool. (Note: it is no longer recommended that one use the term "cool"; a Hipster would instead say "deck.") The Hipster walks among the masses in daily life but is not a part of them and shuns or reduces to kitsch anything held dear by the mainstream. A Hipster ideally possesses no more than 2% body fat.

For further reading, see the wiki article on hipsters (is there anything not in wikipedia?) available here.

Worse people skills than me?

Some things are just too good not to be shared. Las Vegas City Life's Article on P.I Attorney Adam Kutner, who's TV ads are best described as "ubiquitous," is one of these things.

Check it out here. But, be warned, this is a story not for the faint of heart.

What's Spinning on the Ipod

Now that the election is over and we can get back to the ordinary course of politicians ignoring the express will of the people, I thought it would be a good time to drop what's on my iPod playlist.

I cruised some of the celebrity playlists on iTunes and found myself laughing out lout at some of the people trying a little too hard to be cool in their music choices (I'm looking at you, Michael Cera). If you don't really like indie rock, then don't put bands no one has ever heard of on your playlist. It doesn't make you cool, it just makes you a poser.

Here's some of what I'm listening to recently. As you can tell, I'm having a bit of a classic punk phase.

Police on my Back--The Clash



I can't help it, I've become a huge Clash Fanatic. If you are not yet a devotee of the Clash, repent hit amazon.com's mp3 page immediately. Not liking the clash is the musical equivalent of voting no on prop 8.

Ever Fallen in Love (With Someone You Shouldn've)--The Buzzcocks.



You may recognize the song from Pete Yorn's remake for one of the Shrek Movies. He actually did a pretty good job, but original is generally the best. By the way, how does someone as decidedly non-punk as Pete Yorn end up remaking a song by the Buzzcocks? I mean, Jason Mraz redid Blitzkrieg Bop, but at least he was in on the joke. The more I think about it, it's like Coldplay doing a cover of "Anarchy in the U.K." Actually, that would be pretty cool. In fact, I'm now insisting that this happen. Chris Matin, wherever you are, I'm begging you the start remaking Sex Pistols songs. Who wouldn't buy this? If anyone out there has connections in the music industry, make this happen.

You are the Best Thing--Ray Lamontagne


Ray Lamontagne is finally starting to get some much deserved recognition. He's essentially Joe cocker for the modern age. It is criminal that people haven't heard of this guy while that "I kissed a girl" song is playing on a continuous loop on pop radio. If that doesn't prove that civilization is doomed, I don't know what does. Maybe this.

Perfect Day--Lou Reed



Yes, I do know what the song is about and I don't care. It's still beautiful. While we're on the subject, if they ever legalize drugs, I think that instead of a surgeon general's warning, they should just put Lou Reed's picture on the packaging. I think the idea of one day looking that messed up should be enough to deter ANYONE from using. In fact, this could single-handedly win the war on drugs.

P.S. John Cale has a much better voice and more musical talent than Lou Reed, so why was Lou Reed the vocalist for Velvet Underground? These questions keep me awake at night.

Closer--Kings of Leon


Just put their entire latest album here. It's great. I don't even care that they lent their music to an impossibly lame season of Gossip Girl, which is 1/10th the show the O.C. was. Yes, even the 22 episode long practical joke that was season 3. Darn it, it was the show that gave us Death Cab for Cutie and it was much better than Gossip Girl will ever be. It had better music and the girls were 10X hotter. I can no longer discuss this rationally, I'm posting the song Life is a Song by Patrick Park in memoriam.



Head On--The Pixies


Okay, it's a cover, but it's a good one, darnit. Besides the Pixies have the distinction of having been loved by Weezer. The Legiao Urbana version is better, but we try and feature english speaking bands on this site.

Flightless Bird American Male--Iron and Wine



Look, I've been listening to Iron and Wine for years, so I knew them before they were cool. If I could grow a convincing beard, I'd be this guy's exact clone. As such, I'm willing to forgive them for allowing this awesome song to be included on the soundtrack for a certain teeny-bopper vampire movie which I will not allow to be named on this site. Seriously, if you name it in the comments section don't think I won't delete you. The video is from a pretty awesome live version, but the recorded version is great too.

He Doesn't Know Why--Fleet Foxes



I've written about this band before, but I can't say enough about them as far as I am concerned. Buy this CD. GO to amazon and pay the 10 bucks for the whole album; it is absolutely worth it. One of the best bands I have ever heard, spread the word.

That's it for now kiddos. Happy listening.

Day late, dollar short

For those who have not seen it, here is Elder David A. Bednar's discussion on Proposition 8. I realize the vote has come and gone, but you are nuts if you think that this is the last you will hear on the issue. At best, a prop 8 passage will delay the homosexual agenda for a bit. We are going to reach the point in the next few years where only an amendment to the United States Constitution will be able to save marriage.

Elder Bednar also discusses the "Tyranny of Tolerance" and how the label of Bigot will be used to attack those with differing view points. In light of what has happened since the election, i.e. the protests at the temple in L.A., you say his words were prophetic. Please take the time to watch the video as the fight for traditional marriage and the family is far from over and Elder Bednar's discussion is probably the most coherent and reasoned explanation of the subject. Until then, keep supporting traditional marriage and family.

Prop 8 Passes

After 8 years of a very unpopular president and a fairly inept republican party, the Democratic triumph is not unexpected. McCain lost the election when he didn't stand up to the bailout and decry it for what it was: A sham bailout for undeserving, greedy crooks, which covers the mistakes of speculators who turned the economy into their own personal roulette wheel and offers not a dime to help normal people struggling not to lose their homes. He likewise should have denounced the stimulus package for what it was: a band-aid on cancer and a tacit admission by the left that what the country really needs are fewer taxes.

No, an Obama presidency is nothing to worry about. We survived 8 years of a Clinton presidency, this can't be any worse. This economy is beyond repair and in 4 years, Obama will probably be hanging on to his job by a thread. If the republicans can come up with a dynamic leader between now and then (Not Sarah Palin) then it should be a simple matter of "Are you better off now than you were 4 years ago?" Since unemployment will probably have doubled, and foreclosures will still be high, I'm guessing people will be ready to see him go.

The big story in this election is that Gay Marriage Bans passed OVERWHELMINGLY in every state where they were on the ballot. Maybe activist judges will finally get the message that they should not read their own political views into the law. Maybe the Homosexual Agenda will finally realize that the way to bring about change in the country is through broad consensus building and not forcing unwelcome change down America's throat by way of activist judicial fiat.

So, while america voted for change in personnel, it HAS NOT embraced a liberal and permissive agenda as some would have you believe. In essence, the vote against gay marriage says:

GET LOST, LIBERAL JUDGES!

Bill Simmons on Sunk Costs

ESPN.com's Bill Simmons gave a fantastic review of the economic concept of a Sunk Cost. Here it is for your economic education:

What is a sunk cost? In financial terms, it's a lost cause -- you're paying for something that has lost its value to you. Let's say I spent $200 on one of those beautiful, 6-foot-high, glass-blown water bongs and named it Barack Obonga. And let's say I smoked a little too much of the special hydro weed they give to cancer patients, decided someone was watching me through my front window, ran outside in my underwear with a baseball bat, and eventually spent the next two hours sitting in a tree waiting for the imaginary guy to come back before my neighbors called the police. And let's say the whole experience made me say, "You know what? I need to quit smoking pot, it's making me a little crazy." Maybe I'd try to sell the bong on Craigslist to no avail, and none of my friends would take it because there's nothing grosser than owning someone else's bong. At that specific point, Barack Obonga would become a sunk cost; that money is out the window. It's gone. I need to accept this fact and move on.

Full article can be found here

DANNY BLOGS!!!

As some of you know, I have a little brother, and his name is Danny. Here is our stock photo.

My little brosky is pre-med at BYU and he's started up a blog. He's resisted starting a blog for a long time, so I can only assume some sweet girl has finally convinced him to give in and join the Blogosphere. Bienvenidos, Hermano. Everyone go check his blog out right now. His first entry is a delightful discussion of cleansing diets and one of my favorite pastimes, colonics.

Blog may be found, HERE.

Yes on Prop 8

I haven't blogged yet about prop 8. Mostly, it's because so many people have already talked about it and have done a much better job than I could ever do. My old buddy Myron gave the best roundup on it, and I strongly encourage everyone to read his explanation of his position on prop 8.

http://myronn.blogspot.com/search?updated-max=2008-10-17T20%3A22%3A00-07%3A00&max-results=2

Long time Simsisms friend, 84rkr posted his thoughts on prop 8 on his blog. 84's stuff is always well written, and may be found here.

Anyone who thinks that judges imposing their own view in substitution of the people's ignores history. Proponents of Judicial Activism often cite Brown v. Bd of Education as an example of the rightness of Judicial Activism. These people also ignore the fact that there was broad support for desegregation, and that the Supreme Court vote in that decision was UNANIMOUS. They also conveniently ignore the fact that most schools weren't desegregated until the NIXON administration. The judicial branch is simply not a transformative institution and cannot push the country in a direction it does not want to go. Take for example the Decision in Roe v. Wade. The court decided to push the country into universally accepting abortion. We have not had a judicial appointment since that decision that hasn't involved whether or not that decision should be overturned. We can't have an election without abortion being a subject. In essence, we've spent the last 30 years trying to undo Roe v. Wade because half the country despises it and will not accept it.

Courts that put their own political agendas in place of the will of the people they serve undermine their own legitimacy. Take for example the two most activist courts in the country, the 9th and the 5th circuit appeals courts. The 9th circuit panel has essentially become a running joke. You remember them as the ones who struck down the pledge of allegiance. The Supreme Court later tossed that case as the litigant didn't even have standing to bring the lawsuit. No one really takes the 9th court seriously on political questions any more, as it's almost a given that they will be overturned.

The 5th circuit, if memory serves, was chastised by the supreme court for not paying attention to the decision that the Supreme court handed down. The supremes effectively had to issue a bench slap to try and get the 5th circuit back in line. The 5th circuit decisions have been quietly named Cert Petitions because it's almost guaranteed that they will have to be reviewed. (Cert Petition is the name of a document that requests a supreme court review).

Now, a court in California is trying to push the state into a Roe situation. California OVERWHELMINGLY voted to explicitly ban homosexual marriages. There is not broad support for the issue, and people do not accept it. When a court substitutes it's own views in place of the will of the overwhelming majority, or endeavors to force a sea change against the will of the people who the court serves, it undermines its own legitimacy.

Prop 8 ammends the California Constitution to recognize only Heterosexual Unions as a marriage. Only an ammendment to the constitution is sufficient to bind the hands of an activist court and force them to abide by the will of the people instead of calling an audible on societal norms. The court's disregard, and frankly, utter contempt, for the express will of the people makes this ammendment necessary to protect this most sacred union given by God as an essential part of his plan for his children. Vote yes on prop 8.

Don't Vote

For some stupid reason, every election season hippies and well meaning old people descend on colleges and malls everywhere trying to convince the ignorant masses to vote. This is stupid. I know TONS of college students and mall goers and the idea of them having ANY say in what happens in the country makes me break out in a cold sweat. I have a degree in political science and I almost have a doctorate, I actually pay attention to politics and world affairs. My vote is informed and based on things like facts. Most college students view class as a way to kill time between bong hits. They are too ignorant and stupid to vote. There, I said it. Stupid people should not vote, and they should not have the same say in the government as I do. There, call me a snob or an elitis if you want, but deep down you know I'm right. You look at the guy in front of you in the voting line and start wondering if they clean the voting machine before each use. Don't front, you know this has happened.

If you think that raising minimum wage is ever a good idea, you shouldn't vote. If you think Saddam Hussein was connected to Al Queda, you shouldn't vote. If you can't pass a breathalizer test the morning of the election, you shouldn't vote. If you have not studied the issues and can't explain why you think your candidate's plan will work, DO NOT VOTE. Stay home. I can't stress this enough, democracy was not meant to be run by the lowest common denominator, and you are bringing us down. Voting is not mandatory, so please, don't feel obligated.

Another great article on why you shouldn't vote, here.

Take a test to see whether you are qualified to vote, here.

In other news, Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert pretty much hit the nail on the head with his description of the recovery plan.

SP running 4 VP on SNL

Perspective

“And behold, the time cometh that he curseth your riches, that they become slippery, that ye cannot hold them; and in the days of your poverty ye cannot retain them.
And in the days of your poverty ye shall cry unto the Lord; and in vain shall ye cry, for your desolation is already come upon you, and your destruction is made sure; and then shall ye weep and howl in that day, saith the Lord of Hosts . . . Behold, we lay a tool here and on the morrow it is gone; and behold, our swords are taken from us in the day we have sought them for battle.
Yea, we have hid up our treasures and they have slipped away from us, because of the curse of the land.
O that we had repented in the day that the word of the Lord came unto us; for behold the land is cursed, and all things are become slippery, and we cannot hold them.

--Helaman 13

Just a quick reminder in this season of financial uncertainty that perhaps the best investment is to lay up treasures in heaven, where things never lose value and the interest rates are highly favorable.

How to make the debate watchable.

Cracked.com offered some suggestions on how to make the debates better. Here's a couple of my faves.

Full article here

The user's guide to the financial crises has been posted at Freakonomics. Link Here

Luigi ZIngales

University of Chicago economist Luigi Zingales offers a plan B for the economic bailout. Given the market today, this might be a moot point, but still an interesting read.

Link here

In other news, here's my suggestion for the McCain campaign ads.

REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED THE LAST TIME JOHN MCCAIN RAN FOR PRESIDENT AND YOU DIDN'T VOTE FOR HIM?




VOTE MCCAIN

Suze Orman talks credit crunch

The following is an article about Suze Orman's take on the credit crunch. I'm pasting the whole article rather than linking because it originally appeared on the website of a certain well-known talk show host whose name rhyme's with Goprah, and whose website I will not link to or name, purely out of principle.

The American economy has hit a new low. Home values are plummeting, bills are rising and job layoffs have every worker concerned.

Factor in the sudden bankruptcy of 158-year-old investment bank Lehman Brothers, an $85 billion federal bailout of insurance giant American International Group Inc., Bank of America's quick purchase of Merrill Lynch and rumors of future sales and the rejection of a $700 billion government bailout, it's no wonder Americans are worried about their money.

Are you sick to your stomach and scared out of your mind?

Money expert Suze Orman is here to explain what's really going on -- and how you can protect yourself.

"We have built an entire economy on lies and deceit," she says. "It's like building a home or an entire building on a sinkhole. You have a foundation, supposedly. But a little crack, if something goes wrong -- a little earthquake, a tremor -- and it starts to open, everything starts to fall down and ... that is exactly what has happened in the United States of America."

Suze says the current financial downturn started all the way at the top of banks, mortgage companies and brokerage firms.

"There was greed at the top -- serious greed," Suze says. "When you have stocks, you have individual companies that want to make money. And [CEOs] want to make more money because the more money they make, the more their compensation is, the more their stock price goes up."
Don't Miss

These companies made money by selling investments like mortgages to people who couldn't afford them, Suze says.

"Have you all ever wondered, 'Why does Suze Orman say people first, then money, then things?'" she says. "It means if we cared about people more than we cared about money, we would not be having what happened today, because the people who run the corporations, if they had cared about all of you, they wouldn't have created loans that you couldn't afford."

A lack of regulations also contributed to the downfall -- and Suze says there weren't more rules established because they would cut into the bottom line.

"The more money the brokerage firms, the mortgage companies and all those companies made, the better the economy was. Because if they lent you money, you had money now that you could spend," she says. "When the economy looks great, everybody feels like, 'Oh, we're doing good.' The stock market goes up. When the stock market goes up, the price of shares go up. The compensation for the CEOs go up."

As things progressed, Suze says many people fell under Wall Street's spell.

"A lot of you have built your personal financial foundation on deceit and lies. You bought a home that you couldn't afford ... You spent money like it was going out of style and it wasn't your money to spend, because why? They were borrowing it," Suze says. "When you borrow money, you leverage yourself. The United States of America leveraged itself so high that when it started to come down, the whole thing now has fallen down." Oprah.com: 6 deadly sins of home equity

The recent billion-dollar bankruptcies are going to make things more difficult for the average person, Suze says. For example, Suze says securing credit may be nearly impossible.

"The chances of you being able to really get a mortgage, a car loan, even student loans for your children, may be far more difficult than you have any idea," she says. "If you currently have credit cards that you're not using that have open lines of credit on it, probably you will see them close down."

In terms of investments, Suze says people close to retirement may need to reconsider. "Many people now have seen their 401(k) either cut in half [or] down 40 percent," Suze says. "[People] may have to work a lot longer than they planned, may not have enough money to generate income to send their kids to school."

Homeowners will also feel a burden, Suze says. As people lose their jobs, fewer homeowners can afford to pay their mortgages and property taxes.

"The less amount of people that are paying property taxes, the less your state has to pay the firemen, the police department," Suze says. "The more your property taxes go up, the less you can afford your mortgage."

With all of these economic puzzle pieces in play, Suze says she wouldn't be surprised if we switched to a cash economy -- which means buying only what you can afford now.

"Banks aren't going to want to give you money where they're afraid that you might not pay them back," Suze says. "I personally think that's a great thing."

So what can you do to protect yourself? "People, stop living the financial lies that you have been living," Suze says. "If you don't have the money to pay for something, can you just not buy it? Can you wait? Can we start looking at keeping our cars for 10 years rather than getting a new one every three?"

Tammy and Tim are a couple who asked for help cleaning their financial house. Like many Americans, they say they have no health insurance and owe more on their home than what it's worth.

The couple also says they have no life insurance to provide for their two children should tragedy strike. Since Tim was laid off from his job last spring, the couple has been living largely off credit cards -- and owe more than $90,000 across 29 different cards.

Tammy says the bills added up before they knew it. "We are taking every bit of money that we do make and putting it toward our credit card payments. We're very proud people and never have been late in 20 years on our payments," she says. "We tend to take our cash, pay our credit cards and then use our credit cards to pay our mortgage and put gas in our car and feed our kids."

Tim says he and Tammy have no idea what to do once their credit is maxed out. "Right now is where we really need the most help," he says. "We're open for any advice that we can get."

Suze has some tough love for this struggling couple. After looking at Tammy and Tim's finances, Suze says the couple falls $2,000 short each month. With property taxes, utilities and the mortgage payment together, Suze estimates it costs at least $3,000 a month to live in their current home.

Suze's suggestion is a harsh truth for Tammy and Tim. "I love you enough to tell you what you need to do to not only save yourselves, but to save your children so there's enough money then to buy them health insurance, for them to have life insurance," Suze says. "You need to sell your home."

Tim says he's concerned about putting his house for sale in a depressed market.

"If you had just been honest a year ago, two years ago, that you couldn't afford the mortgage payments -- you couldn't afford the lifestyle that you were living -- you would not be in this situation here today," Suze says. "If you get rid of the house, you will start to live an honest life without lies. You'll start to make more money. You'll feel better."

Tim and Tammy want to know what their next step should be. "Let's put the house on the market to sell. Let's see what it should be priced at. Talk to your bank about possibly having to do a short sale and just see what happens from there. That is our first step toward honesty," Suze says.

It won't be easy, but Tammy says they're ready. "Whether we've been naive or not, it's a reality, and now we're finally seeing the light and realizing that it's a change we need to make," she says.

Cash-strapped couples aren't the only ones concerned by the country's economic crisis. Millions of aging Americans who have money in retirement accounts have seen their nest eggs shrink in recent weeks. Suze reveals which people really need to rethink their plans for the future.

If you're 10 to 20 years away from retirement, Suze says there's no reason to panic. "As long as you are invested in good quality mutual funds, diversified across the board, as this all goes down, you're buying more shares," she says. "The more shares you buy, eventually, when it turns around ... the more money you'll make."

The situation is more serious for men and women planning to leave the workforce in the next year. Suze says if you recently lost money in the stock market, there isn't time to recover your losses.

"The harsh reality there is what? You are going to have to work more," she says. "For something to recover -- even at an 8 or 9 percent annual average rate of return -- it could take you 12 years to get back there."

If you need to start dipping into your savings in the next 10 years, Suze says it's best to take your money out of the stock market and invest in CDs and treasury bills or bonds.

"For those people who need the money to be safe and sound, you need it to generate income now. You have to come out [of the stock market] at this point," she says. "It doesn't mean you can't go back in."

Suze says people may also want to start rearranging their funds. "You might put your money in something that gives you a dividend of 4 or 5 percent, so even though it's low, you're getting your income so you can live off of it," she says. "Then if the markets go back up in those areas, you'll make your money back."

Sell Sell Sell

That's it. Market is over. When Cramer is telling you to get out then you know we are in for a crash.

One More

Saturday Night Live got this one spot on. Maybe the world IS ending.

Biden-Palin

Outrage

Remember how this spending bill is supposed to save the economy? Remember how the House rejected it on monday saying it wasn't the answer? Well, the senate has found the answer. Pork. Lots and lots of Pork. What started as a page bill giving the treasury additional authority to buy bad debts has now grown to hundreds of pages in length and contains tax breaks in no way connected with helping the economy. This bill is nothing short of an outrage and it is unconscionable that our lawmakers would use a crisis as an excuse to line the pockets of special interests.

The following excerpt from the new york post gives the details on some of the provisions of the "rescue" bill. Original article here.

The special provisions include tax breaks for:

* Manufacturers of kids' wooden arrows - $6 million.

* Puerto Rican and Virgin Islands rum producers - $192 million.

* Wool research.

* Auto-racing tracks - $128 million.

* Corporations operating in American Samoa - $33 million.

* Small- to medium-budget film and television productions - $10 million.

Another measure inserted into the bill appears to be a bald-faced bid aimed at winning the support of Rep. Don Young (R-Alaska), who voted against the original version when it went down in flames in the House on Monday.

That provision - a $223 million package of tax benefits for fishermen and others whose livelihoods suffered as a result of the 1989 Exxon Valdez oil spill - has been the subject of fervent lobbying by Alaska's congressional delegation.

Some of the pork-barrel measures buried in the financial rescue package had been contained in a bill that previously passed the Senate, but died in the House.

The Congressional Budget Office said the package of breaks - including obvious pork and some more defensible tax-relief measures - will add about $112 billion to budget deficits over the next five years because the bill doesn't contain enough offsetting revenue hikes to keep the budget balanced.

Bailout

A bailout is when a failed president and a failed congress give $700 billion of your money to failed banks. How could this possibly fail?

--Jay Leno


Link to a snappy article on why the bailout is all wrong

Click Here

Apologies

700 Billion Dollars and not a dime will go to save your house.

In honor of all the people who are going to lose their house, the best copy I could find of Ben Gibbard's All Apologies cover.

Mark to Market

In the coming days you might hear about something called "Mark to Market" accounting. This is something that came out of Enron inspired reforms. Companies like Enron would buy an asset, say for $10 billion dollars, then if the asset lost value and became worth, say, only $4 billion dollars, the company would not put the new low value on the books. So, companies like Enron could claim to be worth more than they actually were. Mark to Market was a rule that companies had to relist any assets at their market price if they went down in value. Well, if you are a bank and you suddenly have subprime mortgages that are worth next to nothing, the value of your assets shrinks dramatically and you have to list that on the books, regardless of the fact that you have no intention of selling the mortgages until they recover some value.

A lot of people, particularly from the right of the political spectrum are pushing for this to be modified and you might hear about it in the coming days. Simsisms urges you to do your own research and form your own opinion as to whether this is a good idea or not. Wikipedia has an article on the subject, which can be viewed here.

Many of you know that I love Dave Ramsey, in spite of his many attempts to put me out of business. He is putting forth a solution to the financial crisis that has some interesting ideas. I do not endorse or condemn it; I merely find it interesting. Again, I urge people to do their own research and draw their own conclusions. His plan may be found here.

If that plan appeals to you, there are instructions on daveramsey.com on how you can send that proposal to your congressperson. However, I think it is pretty clear from the past 2 years that your congress person hates you and would probably love nothing more than to poke safety pins into your eye sockets just to try and cause you a little more pain. I'd like to take this time to remind you that you should vote against any incumbent in the fall congressional election as NONE of them, republican or democrat, particularly deserves your vote. If you scored a 10% approval rating on your last performance evaluation, you'd lose your job. They should too.

By the way, the congressional website was apparently so inundated with visitors that it crashed earlier today. It would appear that people have a lot to say about the bailout.

In the "what the (expletive) were they thinking" category, it's suddenly come to light that the moderator of the upcoming VP debates has a decidedly Pro-Obama book coming out in January. This apparently struck no one in the debate organizing world as a conflict of interest. If it strikes YOU as a conflict of interest and you would like to tell the people in charge of the debates, you may do so at (202)-872-1020. Feel free to ring them up and call shenanigans on this.

That's the rundown on the latest. More as things develop.

Verdict on Recent Events

You know the drill. Here's the Simsisms take on recent events.

#1 Obama's performance in the presidential debate.




If I hear one more person talk about how Obama sounded more presidential than McCain I'm going to pop my eardrums a rusty nail. Who cares how a candidate sounds; it's what he says that's important. Time and time again Obama has demonstrated that he is not yet qualified to run the country. He's a great speaker, but what he says is ALL WRONG. He labelled the current financial bust the "Worst financial Crisis since the depression" and has done nothing to stop it. In fact, unless McCain had gone back to Washington, Obama would have stayed out on the campaign trail and would have had no part in the world's the government's lame attempt at a solution (verdict on that later). Exactly what has Obama ever led the way on? We can point to numerous instances of leadersip by his opponent, but none by Obama. Exactly what concrete success has he ever had? I love the fact that he speaks with energy and nice soothing tones, but to me, in order to "sound presidential," a person has to know what they are talking about, not just sound like they do.

P.S. In the presidential race, threatening to invade Pakistan should be an instant disqualification.

Verdict:




Try actually leading something, then come back and talk to us.

#2 McCain's Debate Performance



Look, McCain is not the most dynamic speaker, but I'm inclined to cut him a lot of slack since he is 105 years old and he spent 5 years in a POW camp eating torture for breakfast and pain for diner, washing it down with a huge heaping glass of severe beating.

By the way, anyone who seriously believes John McCain is a George W. Bush clone should have to forfeit the right to vote out of ignorance. George W. Bush is a Neoconservative Evangelical Christian. John McCain is a Pragmatic Moderate who doesn't really care about religion. This whole "John McCain voted with Bush 95% of the time last year" thing needs to end. One, the President doesn't vote. He supports a handful of legislation during the year. Last year, what major issues were there? Iraq and...uh...oh yeah, Iraq. In fact, I don't think Bush really cares about anything else. John McCain and Bush get along because of political convenience, but their relationship ends there. McCain has opposed the Bush administration on a number of things. In fact, he's opposed his party on a number of things. When was the last time Barrack Obama stood against his party? McCain was able to broker a bipartisan truce to end the fillibuster of political appointees, and pass campaign finance reform. What bipartisan success did Obama ever have? McCain has made a career out of standing up for his beliefs, no matter what the cost. Doesn't that sound like the type of person who should be at the helm during a crisis?

I know, I know, he's really old, he could die at any moment. He had skin cancer 8 years ago. Guess what, Obama chain smokes. Biden isn't exactly a spring chicken. By the way, compare the remarks of Joe Biden and John McCain, and then tell me which one of them sounds the most senile. Hint: McCain is not the one who said that when the Depression hit, FDR instantly got on the TELEVISION to rally the country. Yes, that's right, Television in the 1930's. Ladies and gentleman, the man a heart beat away from the presidency, JOE BIDEN!

So, McCain may have seemed old and wooden during his remarks, but the words coming out of his mouth had the benefit of being RIGHT!

Verdict:



Unless you can cite actual positions that Barrack Obama holds and why you support them, then you should vote for the guy who actually knows what he's doing.

#3 The Bailout



The bailout encompasses so many things. First, the Fannie and Freddy takeover, then the other bailouts, possibly a loan to the FDIC, and on it goes as the economy slides down the increasingly slippery slope of failure. We've had our artists come up with a graphic representation of the U.S. economy:



No one seems particularly happy about the bailout. The only positive thing people seem to be saying is that it might have prevented a total meltdown. Some are saying that we have pushed the government further into the market than it was probably ever intended to go and we may never be able to get the government out of the markets it just got into.

But wait, how do we know we've prevented a total meltdown? Haven't we been trying to stop stock market crashes since the 1930's only to find that the market will find a way to correct itself? The are billions of dollars in mortgages that are simply not worth what they once were, and are not going to recover their value for years. That hasn't changed. All these bailouts do is take a problem and nationalize it. Instead of being a problem for 20 million people, now it's a problem for 300 million people. All the money we borrowed to bail these people out has to be paid back. Now, it has to be paid back by the nation as a whole, a nation which already owes trillions of dollars already.

Now, I know some people think that the government might actually be able to hold onto these mortgages long enouh that it will recoup some of the value and even turn a profit. Frankly, I don't see how a government that can barely deliver the mail will manage to turn a profit on a dead housing industry. Bear in mind that this is the same government that could not get water to the superdome after a hurricane. That's who we are supposed to put our trust in.

The fact is, I'm convinced that no one can prevent our economy from crashing. We are a society that lives so far beyond its means that it has forgotten how to live without credit. Financial ruin is ALWAYS the end result of consistently living in debt, and that is what our nation does. Our people live off credit cards so they can buy expensive toys that rot and decay. The government uses credit to fund expansive social programs to pander to voters and to make us feel like we are a caring and enlightened people. We have raised a generation of constituents who have never heard the word "NO" from the government. Unless we change our mindset, unless we become a people and a nation willing to sacrifice and save, then we are destined for a collapse and every dollar that we spend makes the coming crash that much worse.

Verdict:



Sooner or later, it will fall.

#4 The Price of Gas



I've written before that I think gas should cost $4.00 a gallon. All of the negative externalities associate with burning gasoline should make it far more expensive then it has been. That said, how has the price of oil dropped 33% and the price of gas has only dropped by half that percentage? Why isn't there more outrage about this? How much does the Chevy Volt retail for?

Verdict:




Don't expect any favors from the Oil Companies.

#5 Short Sellers

Anyone with a basic grasp of the market, or who has watched 30 seconds of Mad Money with Jim Cramer recently, knows that short selling has pretty much been killing the market. Enough that they have actually had to ban short selling for a while. If you don't know what short selling is, then (a) please don't vote; and (b) go to this link for a brief explanation. Here's the wiki for more info.

The thing is, what has allowed a lot of these short selling damages has been the removal of the uptick rule. The basic premise is that every short sale transaction be entered at a price that is higher than the price of the previous trade. This prevents shorting during a selloff. This rule was instituted after shorting helped destroy the market back in the great depression. The Chairman of the SEC, Chris Cox, decided that this rule was no longer necessary and lifted the uptick rule last year. Incidentally, John McCain called for Chris Cox to be fired last week. We couldn't find a stock photo of Chris Cox, but we're pretty sure this is what he looks like:



The results of lifting the uptick rule have been disasterous, particularly in an already volatile market. One reason why the selloffs have been so big lately is that short sellers have been driving down the price of stock to make a buck. In the end, a lot of innocent companies are being targeted by short sellers who then turn them into the stock market equivalent of Marsellus Wallace in the Gimp scene from Pulp Fiction. Enough is enough; time to bring back the uptick rule.

Verdict:



Stop the Madness!

Economy Links

Links on economic doom.

1) It all comes back to greed. From Freakonomics.com

2) Why Secretary Paulson is wrong. From University of Chicago

3) Mark Cuban's plea for both candidates to revoke their economic plans in the wake of the recent buyouts. Agreeing with my position that Tax Cuts now become a virtual impossiblity

4) Diamond and Kahyap on the financial upheaval. From Freakonomics last week

5) Naked Capitalism, why you should hate the bailout.

6) Obama lied about how Social Security recipients would have lost everything under privitization. From factcheck.org.

7) Obama was NOT the 4th largest recipient of donations from Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. That's a dirty political lie. Obama was the SECOND largest recipient of donations from Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. From factcheck.org

Remember: In this year's national elections, vote against the incumbent.

Regime Change

I've thought a lot about the recent government takeovers, financial crisis, gas problems, etc. I'm not sure where I stand on a lot of things. I support high gas prices, but the rest of it, I just don't know how I feel yet. I do know that things should never have gotten this bad. I also know that it is not just the democrats who are at fault, or the republicans who are to blame. It's not one party's fault; it's everyone's fault. As far as national politicians go, they ALL failed us.

That is why I have come up with a radical solution. This fall when you vote in national elections, don't vote along party lines. Vote against the incumbent. Every single member of congress should lose his or her job. They should all be replaced. Let's finally hold people accountable, let's throw them all out. Let's have real change, let's get rid of everyone.

UDOT MEETING

Special Post for all of my Utah Bretheren. UDOT is having an open house in the Provo/Orem area, Thursday, September 18. They are soliciting feedback about which roads need to be more friendly to bike riders.

More info may be obtained at bikeutahvalley.org, one of my favorite, and oft pimped for sites.

Happy Birthday Danny!

There's about a million things I want to blog about. Lehman brothers, Merrill Lynch, Bankruptcy, England, etc. But, today, we pause and recognize a truly momentous and important occasion.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LITTLE DANNY!!!

I didn't have time to compose a poem for you, but I did find this great birthday song and I think it expresses everything quite well. So here's to you little buddy.

Palin and Clinton

Hilarious!

Should we raise the price of water?

Second part of this weeks series on the economics of water. Explains why we have a shortage of water, which falls from the sky, and no shortage of oil, which we have to drill for.

Click HERE to go to the article.

Clean Water

I know that the radical shift in tone from each blog post must throw some of you, but I can't help it. The reason this happens is possibly because I'm a person of such radically diverse interests. Unfortunately, this means that 2 out of every 3 posts are meant to be ironic, with the remainder actually having some serious or relevant point.

This post is one of those serious/relevant point things. I like to stay informed on the world and when I catch something interesting or informative I like to pass it on. I found a great article on freakonomics (one of my favorite sites) on economics of clean water. I found it a great, informative read on a very basic problem and I strongly encourage everyone to check it out.

Article is called Potability, Politics, and Pipes By David Zetland

Please read and encourage others to read, and also discuss the article and the issues it talks about at your water cooler.

From the Sports Guys Mailbag

Too good not to share.

Q: MEMO

From: Satan
To: Tom Brady
Subject: Re: Our Deal

I've fulfilled my end of the deal. Now, your soul is mine. Can you please notify Belichick that I will be collecting him and his video tapes in the coming weeks once I finish with Archie Manning and sons?
-- Kevin, San Diego

You can read the rest of Bill Simmons Mailbag here.

Open Letter to the Miami Dolphins

Dear Miami Dolphins,

Football season is under way and I wanted to take a moment to reflect with you on last season. Greatness was within your grasp, and you blew it. You kept yourself out of the history books. You could ave gone 0 and 16, completely winless, and you tanked. You showed up, and for no reason at all, decided to actually try hard. And you know what, it blew up in your faces, didn't it. You won that game and your spot in the history books vanished. Millions of your loyal supporters, mediocre cynics like myself who simply wanted to see a new level of terrible achieved went away empty-handed.

Now, I'm here to urge you this year to try again. I know what you're thinking, last year was the year. If you couldn't go winless with a team that bad, it just isn't meant to be. Well, I think that's nonsense. Miami Dolphins, I know you have it in you to not have it in you. I know that you can succeed at failure. I know that with a lot of misspent effort and blown off practice, the 2008-2009 season can be the worst season ever! You can show up to the field and phone it in, I know you can, you've done it before. Bill Parcels is over the hill and gaining speed, you don't need to listen to him. Have you seen the man wear shorts? He should have zero credibility based on that alone.

I know, you think you have to score every football game. There's something in you that says you can't help but try hard. But, I watched you today. I watched you struggle against the New York Jets. I'm telling you, that if you can lose to a team as dreadful as the Jets, you can lose to anybody. More importantly, you can lose to everybody. It's the Jets! They were led to victory by Brett Favre's reanimated corpse! He's so old he mixes his gatorade with metamucil and unicorn blood at half time just to keep going.

Believe, Miami Dolphins, Believe. Believe in miraculous disasters. Believe in disappointments. Believe in Epic Failure. I know you can do this.

I believe in you.

Brad

Emmafied Review and Comment on the News.

August 31, 2004. A day that will live...in infamy. This is the day that my darling niece Emma came into the world. So, in commemoration of Emma's 4th birthday, I bring you an Emma themed review and comment on the news.

Here we go Tigers!

Item #1

John McCain picked a running mate.

Verdict:



Good Choice.

Sure, She's short on experience but so what. She did manage to become governor, didn't she? Okay, so her chief experience was being mayor of a town of 7ooo people, but it still beats Joe Biden, whom I wouldn't trust to run a Dairy Queen, let alone a town of 7000 people. It's not like Barrack Obama has any room to talk. His years of experience aren't exactly numerous and the tims he's spent in national office has been mostly spent positioning himself to run for president.

Personally, I like this pick. She's a reform advocate which means she'll get along with McCain and she's not well known enough that people know enough to hate her. Most importantly, she's a woman and that can help draw in disaffected Hillary supporters who want to see the glass ceiling shattered. That's right, it's the republicans who put a woman on a presidential ticket. Not just any ticket, but one that could actually win. Compare this with the democratic party which will only put a woman on the ticket if it has no chance to win. Go read the wiki on Geraldine Ferraro. Go on, I'll wait. Watch some youtube clips. Then, breath a sigh of relief that the Democrats had the good sense not to put her on the ticket in a year that they might have won.

Not only is Palin not crazy like Geraldine Ferraro, but she also has the benefit of not being evil, like say, another woman who recently came close to being president. Considering that Palin is running with John McCain, a man so old and in such poor health that he could literally fall over at any moment, she may actually be president soon. You go girl!

Item #2

Obama Picks a Running Mate.

Verdict:




Meh.

In an effort to snatch defeat from the jaws of inevitable victory, Obama picked well known Senate Blowhard Joe Biden as his running mate. Joe's actually a pretty good guy, but there's no denying he was the safe pick. He doesn't anger any core supporters and no one is going to flee the Obama camp because of Biden. A cooler choice would have been Bill Richardson. How cool would it have been to have a ticket featuring the first black man and the first latino to be President/V.P?

While Biden doesn't alienate core supporters, he doesn't bring anyone knew to the table. Also, conservatives hate him. That makes it more likely that republicans will show up to the polls to vote, rather than stay home in apathy.

By the way, I don't care if you are Republican or Democrat. This subtitled clip of Joe Biden is hilarious.

Item #3

Gas prices stay high

Verdict




Yay!

What? How can I be glad that gas prices are insane? Stop for a moment and consider the benefits of high gas prices. First, as long as gas stays high people will drive less. That means less pollution, and less traffic. Driving in Vegas is crowded to begin with, so less cars on the road is a good thing. Second, people who drive less will look for other ways to travel, such as walking or riding a bike. More exercise means better health and trimmer waist lines, which in turn means people live longer. Also, as long as gas prices stay high, there's an incentive to look for other, cleaner sources of energy. New sources of energy are the only way we are going to break our narcotic dependency on oil and stop funding countries run by militant religious fanatics (I'm looking at you, Saudis).

Perhaps most importantly, the number of auto accident related deaths has plummeted to the lowest levels recorded since the Kennedy administration. That's right, high gas prices save lives. Think about that next time you gripe about your pain at the pump.

More important than saving lives: High gas prices mean more bankruptcies. Gotta fund those Emma Birthday Gifts somehow!

Item #4

New Orleans is probably going to be destroyed (again).

Verdict:



Here comes another mess to clean up.

If you stood on a certain spot and got struck by lightening, then stood on the exact same spot and got struck by lightening again, and this happened day after day, wouldn't you eventually stop standing on that spot? Can we agree to not rebuild New Orleans this time? In light of the fact that God really, really, REALLY wants this city destroyed, who are we to argue? Let's quit lighting our money on fire rebuilding a city that apparently tops the Almighty's "Smite List" let's spend the money on something else, like relocating all of the residents of New Orleans to a city that does not lie in the path of a Hurricane Gulf Stream.

* * * * *

That's it for this week, kiddos. Congrats to the recently engaged and the soon to be married.

Great Moments in Bankruptcy

Just FYI, if you're catholic and live in the San Diego area you might want to be a little more generous with what you put in the collection plate. Seems the San Diego Diocese has filed for chapter 11 bankruptcy.

Story may be found on the California Bankruptcy Blog, here.

The Return of Law School

In Honor of the First Day....

Chad Johnson, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways. Ocho Cinco.

http://www.sportingnews.com/blog/the_sporting_blog/entry/view/10861/chad_johnson_finds_genius_way_around_fines

Greatest Website Ever.

I feel hungry

http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/

The Art of Relaxating

This is what my day is like

The Fall of Boyd Law

http://wildwildlaw.blogspot.com/2008/08/trouble-at-unlvs-boyd-school-of-law.html

This link provides the story of the current decline of my once not so horrible school. Please take a moment to read. If you are a boyd student, please spread it around.

Songs you should hear but probably haven't

White Winter Hymnal by Fleet Foxes




I'm Amazed by My Morning Jacket



Catch Hell Blues (cover) by The White Stripes



Head On (cover) by the Pixies



Rudie Can't Fail by the Clash (Okay, so the video is actually one of Joe Strummer and the Mescaleros. I couldn't find a decent one of the actual Clash version. So sue me).